If the Hulkster were in any branch, no doubt he'd be a Marine.
Brace yourselves. The Marine Corps birthday memes are coming.
In case you’re not friends with any Marines, or you somehow haven’t heard, the Marine Corps birthday is coming on harder than a Marine Expeditionary Unit hitting a beach with a max payload of liberty and justice for all.
While the other military branches tend to regard their services’ birthdays with either general indifference or mild enthusiasm, the Marine Corps is basically a religious cult that worships weapons, violence, and alcohol (it was literally born in a bar). So every fall, Devil Dogs carve out about a six-week period to offer up the sacrifice of their livers to their Lord and Savior Chesty Puller while celebrating the service’s birth and origin story by *checks notes* cutting cake with swords and getting absolutely shit-hammered.
Over the years, we’ve learned it’s best to take the “if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em” route when the blitzkrieg of Marine Corps birthday memes inevitably takes over our social feeds this time of year and just quietly surrender to the overwhelming force of jarhead fanaticism.
So happy birthday, Marines. We got you these memes about how absolutely nuts you are about your birthday. Semper Fi.
Hello, darkness, my old friend …
Historically accurate rendition of how the Marines were born in a Philadelphia bar in the early days of the Revolutionary War. Beautiful.
This meme may not be 100% accurate, but Marines never let historical accuracy get in the way of a good legend. (Don’t cancel me, Marine Corps.)
Note the Marine in the back signaling for the rear element to bring up the stolen donkey and beer bongs. The Navy will never see them coming.
Reach out to your sailor friends; they get the worst of this.
Accurate, except for the champagne. It would definitely be whiskey … or the blood of something they killed. Maybe both.
“Semper goddamn YUT.”
Hang in there, little buddy.
Certain Coffee or Die Magazine staffers keep saying the “Marines eat crayons” meme is tired. And some of us keep ignoring them.
Money says that at least one of the two privates watching this goes on to try to cut cake at a strip club with a battle ax and critically wounds a stripper.
Per regulation, Marines are only allowed to celebrate the Fourth of July, killing the enemy, and the Corps’ birthday. That’s it.
Homelander from The Boys is a hardcore narcissist who arrogantly flaunts his power and perceived invincibility. Why does this sound familiar to us …?
It’s funny, but it’s also a lie. No Marine has ever uttered the words, “One drink, and we go home.”
For their birthday, Marines serve themselves a massive cocktail of camaraderie and chaos — an annual re-drinking of the proverbial Kool-Aid. And while we will always give these beautiful, brainwashed bastards shit for it, we can’t help but respect the ritual.
Semper Fi, leathernecks. And happy birthday.
Eric Miller is a former Army Combat Medic from Parkersburg, West Virginia. He holds a bachelor’s degree in history and has worked with homeless populations and veteran services throughout the state. He is an avid outdoorsman and has recently become interested in woodworking.
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