Great, Now the Russians Have Lightsabers

With the threat of a Russian invasion of Ukraine looming like a storm cloud over Eastern Europe, international relations are a bit tense. Now, in addition to fielding the most tanks of any nation in the world, Russia apparently has lightsabers, too. 

In a video posted by YouTuber Alex Burkan, the Russian hobbyist revealed what is officially the world’s first retractable lightsaber. He received the Guinness World Record for his creation, which appears to contain enough power to cut through metal. The “lightsaber” is not quite up to Jedi standards, as it only burns for 30 seconds. It’s essentially a giant, self-contained blowtorch. 

Burkan’s not the only sabersmith out there making Jedi weapons in his garage. James Hobson of Hacksmith Industries created an even cooler version, though it requires the wielder to wear a backpack containing liquid propane and oxygen to power the device. 

So, while Burkan’s creation is a dream come true for Star Wars nerds, it’s not quite “an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.” Sure, it can melt the lock off a door and looks cool, but Han Solo was right about lightsabers. Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good blaster at your side, kid.

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